The Blind Leading the Blind - 48HFP Practice

On January 17th, Jess and I decided to do another script writing challenge for 48 Hour Film Project practice. Our trial had the following specifics:

Name: Kasey (male) / Karan (female) Troutman

Occupation: Nuclear Engineer

Prop: Lemons

Line of Dialogue: Moscow is a dirty place.

Genre: Comedy

We came up with a loose plot:

The main character is lonely. His sister is getting married and wants to make sure he doesn’t show up stag. For both reasons, he has agreed to go on dates to find a potential companion. He stands up the first blind date, putting his sister on edge. He is in danger of upsetting their nuclear family.  His best bud, a known womanizer, convinces him to attend a speed dating event in hopes of finding a date. He doesn’t find anyone. They’re all awful and not right for him. His sister makes him pick up her friend for the wedding - the one he stood up but he doesn’t know it. She turns out to be lovely and just what he’s looking for. (She can even mention she’s glad he’s not like this jerk who stood her up.) New girl is a veterinarian. He’s a dog walker. They hit it off.

Scenes:

• Apartment or car or office, on phone - Adam on phone with his sister talking about how she wants him to not show up alone to her wedding, and that she had set him up on a blind date but he didn’t show. (“That’s not how I get to know people.” “Well, how would you know how to meet people? All you do is ”)
• Restaurant - Scene with his buddy setting him up for speed dating; Same restaurant - Speed dating scene - goes through several speed date encounters, various cover stories
• Same as first scene - Adam on phone with sister again, being asked to pick up her friend for the big day
• Car - Picking up the friend for the big day, hitting it off, indirect reveal that she’s the blind date (not to her)

The script follows:

THE BLIND LEADING THE BLIND

INT. OFFICE - DAY

Adam is talking on a PHONE, standing next to his DESK. We hear only his side of the conversation, with brief pauses between.

Adam:

(Impatient)

No. No blind dates. No fixing me up.

Adam’s face looks pained. He holds the phone at arms length while his sister berates him. Then he brings the phone to his ear.

Adam:

Yes. I’m an ass because she had to eat lunch by herself.

Adam:

People go to weddings alone all the time. It’s not the end of the world.

Adam:

You sure it’s the only time? Half of all weddings end in divorce.

Adam:

(Bordering on angry)

Whatever. Have a nice bachelorette party.

Adam hangs up the PHONE and sighs heavily. The phone rings again.

Adam:

(Angry)

What?!

Adam:

(Really friendly)

Oh, hey, man! What’s up?

Adam:

(continues friendly)

Yeah, wings, beer, trivia. What’s not to like? See you tonight!

Adam hangs up the phone again, putting it in his pocket.

INT. RESTAURANT - NIGHT

Adam and best friend sit in a booth at a hip downtown bar having buffalo wings and drinks. Place gets crowded around them.  

Mike:

I’m telling you, dog walking business is going to get you so much tail!

Adam:

(Gulping down beer)

That’s gross. No, not the beer.

Mike:

Lady tail, not dog tail. Ladies love a man who’s good with animals. Maybe I could come by, help you out from time to time.

Adam:

Sure. Like when I’m lava surfing in Argentina or sky diving in Peru.

Mike:

    Hell yes. If you die, can I get your shit? Hold that thought. I’ll be right back.

Mike gets up from table. Crowd fills in the restaurant. Adam receives a text from sister:

Text:

Need you to pick up boutonnieres Saturday morning.

Mike comes back.

Adam:

That was fast. Did you forget to shake it?

Mike:

I never forget to shake it.

Speed Dating Emcee:

(over microphone)

Hi everyone! What a great night to meet some great people. Am I right?

Adam:

What’re we doing here?

Mike:

Getting you a date.

Adam (CU)

(face frozen in shock)

Mike:

I know what you’re thinking.

Adam:

How?

Mike:

It’s time to get back on the horse.

Adam:

No. No. No. No.

Mike:

Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.

Adam:

No. No. No.

Mike:

Yes. Yes.

Adam:

No.

Mike:

YES! C’mon son!

Hot woman walks up to the table.

HOT WOMAN:

Hi! I’m a little nervous. This is my first speed date. Are you guys doing this too?

Mike and Adam:

Yes.

HOT WOMAN:

Great. Hope to see you out there.

Hot woman walks away.

Mike:

And you doubted me.

(Clicks tongue)

Mike holds name tag sticker out. Adam grabs it.

INT. RESTAURANT - NIGHT

Adam sits at a table for two sipping his BEER. Main emcee Table is next to him. BELL dings. Michelle sits down at the table opposite from him.

   

Michelle:

Hi there. Why don’t you tell me a little bit about yourself?

Adam:

Well, I’m not sure why I’m here. My friend kind of dragged me into this and my sister wants me to find a date for her wedding.

Michelle:

(unenthusiastically)

How nice.

Joanne sits opposite of him. All business

Joanne:

I like water skiing, biking and horses. I work as an analyst for an IT Firm. I’ve just recently moved here and I’m looking to meet new people.

Adam:

That sounds exhausting. I like to play video games and cry my loneliness into buckets of popcorn.  

Wendy sits opposite of him.

Wendy:

So, John, you’re a good-looking fellow. Why are you here?

Adam:

(rapid-talking auctioneer)

Well, when I was 12 years old I had my first kiss behind the barn with a thirteen year old. After that I had a few different girlfriends in high school then I went to college where I met the woman who broke my heart nine different ways from Sunday. I dropped out of college and decided to work in an office part time while I got my dog walking business off the ground. Now my sister wants me to find a date for her wedding and my best friend thought it’d be a good idea to do that here. How do you do?

Wendy:

Um… what?

Sarah sits opposite of him. Goth. She has blacked out the entire NAME TAG with the SHARPIE. She wears an ironic, happy shirt with a picture of lemons and the words, “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.” Cut back and forth twice each between Adam and Sarah, neither saying anything. Bell Dings. Sarah stands up and walks away.

Adam:

Well, good to get to know you.

       

Karan woman sits opposite of him. Nuclear Engineer

Karan:

I’m Karan Troutman. What do you do?

Adam:

I’m a nuclear engineer.

Karan:

Me too! What’s your alma mater?

Adam:

I went to school in Russia.

Karan:

Wow. That must’ve been exciting.

Adam:

Not really. Moscow is a dirty place.

Karan:

I’ve never been.

Adam:

Good. You’re lucky.

Karan:

Would you like my number?

Adam:

No.

Karan:

But I’m a nuclear engineer. You’re a nuclear engineer. That must mean something

Adam:

It means we’re done here.

Adam reaches over and dings the main table bell

EXT. STREET - DAY

Adam pulls up to the curb outside Tracy’s house. Tracy comes out of the house carrying BOUTONNIERES. She has a dog keychain. Adam gets out of the car and opens the door for her.

Adam:

Didn’t realize boutonniere means “beautiful woman.”

Tracy:

Thank you.

Tracy gets in the car.

INT. CAR - DAY

Tracy’s eyes follow Adam. Adam gets in the car.

Tracy:

Thanks for the ride. My car got impounded.

Adam:

Impounded?

Tracy:

I planned a pretty wild party.

Adam:

Did you have midgets?

Tracy:

They’re called little people. And no. But I’m pretty sure there was a goat involved. I was a little worried I would’ve had to take a cab.

Adam:

Why’s that?

Tracy:

Last time I was supposed to meet up with a guy, he never showed.

Adam makes a pained face

Tracy:

Don’t worry. I’m sure you’ll show next time.

Adam glances over at Tracy and smiles.

Our first read-through came in just under 5 minutes. Our second was more like 4:25. We decided we would actually like to shoot this one to give us practice doing over-the-shoulder shots. If it turns out, I'll share the video! In the script, the only thing we missed for 48 Hour Film was the prop - lemons - but we figured there would be plenty of opportunity for having lemons in the scene somewhere.

 

The Homecoming - The Iron Writer quarterfinals

I got into the quarterfinals for The Iron Writer by winning one of the challenges. The elements for this challenge were: a grieving boy, growing up and growing old, an imprisoning life, an adventuresome journey. I like the way this one turned out, even though I turned the "adventuresome journey" around from what the reader (and judge) might have been expecting.

As to the outcome, the judges gave me 1st, 1st, 2nd and 3rd (four judges), but in the popular vote, I was fourth, so didn't win. Here's the story.

Homecoming

It was the first time I had been to my home town in years. Last time was to lay my mother to rest. The place hadn't changed a bit, though in some ways it seemed smaller than ever. I walked into the funeral home, this time for my brother. Though we were identical twins, we looked nothing alike, least of all with him in the casket. We were both tall, but he had always hunched, which turned into a stoop. I have dark hair. What little he had left is gray. He spent his days in whatever weather the farm offered, while I was in my city office. Our differences didn't stop there. Any time I would try to help improve his life, we fought. It didn't matter if it was helping him meet outside suppliers or trying to get internet out to his farm. He wanted nothing to do with me. If we spoke of religion, we fought. Sports? We fought. Family? We fought.

My nephew sat up front, nearest the open casket. He stared at the only man he had known his entire life, his face streaked with tears. He had grown, both up and out, filling out the borrowed suit he wore. He was just getting to an age where he would have rebelled against his old man, and now he wouldn't get to. I was in for a rough road, but he was my blood. With luck, he would appreciate a change in scenery. After all, the world is a much bigger place. He was about to discover how much bigger.

I sat next to him. “Hello, William.”

Without looking at me he said, “Uncle.” After a deep, shaky breath, he turned to me. “You here to sell the farm?”

“I am.”

“My daddy always said you weren't no good at running things. He figured once he got sick that you'd swoop in like a vulture and cash out. I guess he was right about you.”

There was so much of his father in him, it made me wonder about myself. Before I could stop myself, I said, “Tell you what. You show me how to run things and I'll give it a year.”

“You mean that?”

I looked at my late brother, then at my nephew, my pulse racing. “I believe I do. I'm up for retirement anyway.”

William nodded and stood up. “We better get to it, then. There's a lot to do before the sun goes down.” When I stood next to him, he offered his hand. “Call me Bill.”

Shiny Side Up - 48HFP Practice

The weekend between Christmas and New Years, Jess and I did a second full dress rehearsal for the 48 Hour Film Project. Once again we used the script specifics generator and got the following:

Name: Derek / Dori Beehler

Occupation: Utility Meter Reader

Prop: a garden

Line of Dialogue: I am going to sleep.

Genre: Mistaken Identity

Here is what we came up with:

Summary: Paranoid person freaks out over meter reader and captures them.

“Shiny Side Up”

-----

INT. HOME OFFICE - DAYTIME

Paranoid person sitting at DESK with NEWSPAPER CLIPPINGS and other paranoid BOOKS. SETI screensaver playing on the screen. A TIN FOIL HAT sits upon his head. Some sort of music is on in the background. Sitting at desk and scrolling through stories.

PARANOID PERSON:

They can’t hide for long with all the technology we have at our disposal. I wonder if the McRib is back.

Paranoid person stands up and looks out the window in case someone is out there. Sits down and works more.

PARANOID PERSON:

I could always get a cheeseburger, I suppose. Come on, SETI. Find ‘em.

Paranoid person stands up and looks out the window.

PARANOID PERSON:

What the...

EXT. “BACKYARD” - DAYTIME

Meter reader walks along SIDEWALK wearing a BRIGHT ORANGE JACKET with WIRELESS READER and CLIPBOARD in hand. Stops in front of the house. Shakes wireless reader as though it is not working. Begins to walk toward the house.

INT. HOME OFFICE - DAYTIME

Paranoid Person sees meter reader through WINDOW and begins shaking. He stands up and begins pacing.

PARANOID PERSON:

(Agitated)

They’re back! No! No! No! Not again!

Paranoid person looks out the window through his TELESCOPE.

PARANOID PERSON:

(Agitated)

What the fuck is she doing in my garden!?

Paranoid Person puts the telescope down, opens a LEDGER, and makes a note in it.

PARANOID PERSON:

The last time she came around was November 15th. That’s exactly 30 days! And before that, October. 30 days again!

INT. HALLWAY OF HOME - DAYTIME

Paranoid person races to the door, clumsily putting on BOOTS and JACKET.

PARANOID PERSON:

(Putting on JACKET)

Not this time!

Paranoid person opens the DOOR and storms out.

EXT. “BACKYARD” - DAYTIME

Meter reader puts WIRELESS READER inside JACKET and writes down her findings on a CLIPBOARD with a PEN. Paranoid person comes up behind her. Meter reader turns and looks over her shoulder. Paranoid person hits her across her face. Meter reader gets knocked out and lands on the ground.

INT. GARAGE - NIGHT

Meter reader sits unconscious and bound with her hands behind her back to a CHAIR. Paranoid person searches her jacket, finding her WIRELESS READER. Meter reader begins to wake. Paranoid person steps back, examining the device.

METER READER:

(Groans)

PARANOID PERSON:

(Stands in front of the meter reader)

Where are your friends?

Meter reader opens her eyes and reaches to touch her face. Upon realizing she can’t move her arms, she begins to wiggle her hands and arms to break free.

METER READER:

What the fuck?

PARANOID PERSON:

You heard me! Where are the rest of them!?

METER READER:

I don’t know what you’re talking about!

PARANOID PERSON:

Is this what you use to communicate to the mother ship? Huh!?

METER READER:

Mother ship? Let me go you crazy fuck!

PARANOID PERSON:

Oh, how the tides have turned. Tell me how to contact the others.

METER READER:

Fine! In my other pocket there’s a phone. Dial 9-1-1 and tell them a crazy person has a government employee hostage!

PARANOID PERSON:

You work for the government! What a clever cover. How many others work for the government?

METER READER:

(To herself)

This is not happening. This is not happening.

PARANOID PERSON:

Stop it. Stop talking to yourself!

METER READER:

My name is Dori Beehler. I went to CSU. I live with my parents while I save up enough money to get my own place. Check my pockets. I have my credentials. Please! Check my pocket.

Paranoid person searches other jacket pocket, finds CREDENTIALS CASE. Flips it open, revealing her ID and GOVERNMENT CARD.

PARANOID PERSON:

Of course you would have an ID. You have to keep your cover.

Paranoid person hits random buttons on her WIRELESS READER and holds it in the air to get a signal.

METER READER:

What are you going to do to me?

PARANOID PERSON:

What am I going to do to you? What are you going to do to me!?

Paranoid person opens the GARAGE DOOR slightly and bends down to peek out.

METER READER:

HELP! Someone help! Please! FIRE!

Paranoid person quickly closes the GARAGE DOOR.

PARANOID PERSON:

Would you shut up!?

METER READER:

Why? If you’re going to kill me, maybe someone will see and you won’t get away with it.

PARANOID PERSON:

(Startled)

Kill you? I’m not going to kill you. I’m not a monster.

METER READER:

Then why won’t you untie me and let me go?

PARANOID PERSON:

Because I was bound for what felt like an eternity. When I got back, not a day had gone by and no one cared.

METER READER:

If you let me go, I’ll help you find them.

PARANOID PERSON:

That doesn’t make sense. Why are you here every 30 days for the last 6 months? Are you checking in on me?

METER READER:

What? No. I’m a Utility Meter Reader, like it says on the card. I have a grid of utility boxes to check, and the neighborhood box just happens to be in your backyard. Usually I can get the readings wirelessly, but today our network decided to be spotty. Just my luck.  

PARANOID PERSON:

All right, Meter Reader, answer me this. Are we alone in the universe?

METER READER:

No, man. The truth is out there and shit. There have to be other life forms. I just don’t know why they’d be interested in a species like us.

PARANOID PERSON:

Oh, they’re interested. Very interested. I was taken once. To find truth, you have to filter out the static.

Paranoid person reluctantly removes TIN FOIL HAT and places it upon her head.

PARANOID PERSON:

There. Are you getting the signal?

METER READER:

Oh, boy.

PARANOID PERSON:

Well?

The garage door opens. GREEN and WHITE LIGHT streaming in. He looks back at Meter Reader who has turned her head away.(Camera Direction: MCU on PP’s legs silhouetted by the lights, pull back and up for wide frame shot of PP in front of garage door and lights.) (spaceship sound effect) (fade to white)

METER READER:

(Scoffs)

Took them long enough.

Meter reader pulls her hands free without issue and stands up. ROPE goes flying. Removes TIN FOIL HAT.

METER READER:

Fucking things actually work.

(dark screen, pause a second)

INT. HALLWAY OF HOME - DAYTIME

Paranoid person walks through his home as though he had been assraped.

PARANOID PERSON:

I am going to sleep.

(Credits roll)

This one was far better than Sycamore, and the actual movie was something we haven't been too ashamed to show people since then. (Warning: Some NSFW language.) It actually took us 51 hours to get to this point, which is better than we did with Sycamore (which wasn't technically finished for a week or two after the weekend).

We've gotten good feedback on the script, and have actually tried a few things on the edit, such as shortening the whole thing, having the meter appear in a vignette through the telescope, taking out the "what the---" lines, etc. I was really happy with the music (or lack thereof in some places) we used.

For something two people who don't quite know what they're doing to put together in a weekend? Not bad! More practice to come, of course.