48HFP practice session - 2011-07-19

This is the first practice session I've done in a while. I wanted to take a break from my Tuesday-lunchtime-writer-group editing and write something new. I settled on a 48 Hour Film Project practice run. (Click the 48hfp tag on this post to see my other attempts.)


Character:
Random word Lager becomes Margareta Lager or Georg Lager (I used Margareta) for the name
Random word Server becomes Process Server for the occupation


Prop:
Spring


Line of Dialogue:
Random word "falling" becomes "If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything."


Genre:
Heist


The first impediment is that my laptop's battery was totally dead, so I had to go analog today. The second impediment was the shortened writing session, in order to grab some actual lunch.


Script
EXT. OUTSIDE CLOSED APARTMENT/HOUSE DOOR


MARGARETA LAGER checks her WATCH.
CU: Watch - 12:45 PM
ML: (Knocks on the door, paper in her hand)
BILL BARNES: (opens the door from inside, looks ML up and down) Yes?
ML: Mr. Barnes?
BB: Yes?
ML: (hands a FOLDED PAPER to BB) You've just been served.
BB: (takes folded paper, turns on the charm) I didn't catch your name.
ML: You're right. You didn't.
BB: (charming) I haven't had lunch yet. Would you join me?
ML: (gives a crooked smile, checks watch again) I think I will.
BB: (beams/grins) Great! (tosses folded paper over his shoulder, steps out, closes and locks door as ML watches) You can't be too careful these days, right?
ML: Right


EXT. SIDEWALK BETWEEN APARTMENT/HOUSE AND CAR
BB: Do you mind driving?
ML: Not at all!
ML and BB walk away from the door, towards her car.
BB: So, what do you like to eat, Ms. ... (hinting at her giving her name)
ML: Lager. Margareta Lager.
BB: (stops walking, looks skeptically) Seriously?
ML: Serious as a heart attack!
BB: (seems to realize something)
They start walking again
(small talk)
They reach her car


INT. SITTING IN CAR, ML IS DRIVING
BB: (gets a text on his CELL PHONE, looks at it) Excuse me.
CU on Cell Phone: TEXT: How to get past guard?
BB texts: Fake heart attack. I'm serious! (puts cell phone away)
(small talk)
BB guides ML to RESTAURANT


EXT. OUTSIDE TABLE AT RESTAURANT
BB guides ML to an OUTSIDE TABLE. He checks the view and holds a CHAIR out for her. He then sits down such that he can see the NEXT BUILDING over.
BB texts: Guard in position. Team 1 go
Small talk about how BB is wanted as a "person of interest" in a robbery investigation.
Behind BB & ML, background scene is a MAN FAKING A HEART ATTACK.
GUARD comes forward to help.
People sneak in behind the guard. 
Check arrives. ML offers cash, BB puts his VISA down.
WAITER takes check, returns with RECEIPT and a FOUNTAIN PEN.
Come out in minute with STUFF.


In background, you see one man sending a text
CU on Cell Phone: TEXT: Need something small and metal to stop burglar alarm
BB reads the text, picks up the fountain pen delivered with the receipt, unscrews it and removes the SPRING. He holds the spring between thumb and forefinger and launches it over ML's head as she is reaching for her purse to pay her part of the check.
Man on cell phone catches the spring, tosses it to an ASSOCIATE still inside the building. 
Man faking heart attack appears to be recovering, keeps distracting the guard.
Thieves escape, alarm does not sound. ML sits up again.
Talk between BB and ML at table winds up with, "If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything."


ROLL CREDITS


During credits, cut back to restaurant scene. Show BB and ML leaving, his arm around her shoulders. Show guard returning to his post. Show heart attack faker walking away. Guard waits a moment, then goes inside the building. A moment later, he comes out and sounds the alarm.


THE END

Bloodroot - reading

Finished "Bloodroot" by Amy Greene. The style of the story reminded me a great deal of "This Bitter Earth," except that I couldn't get into a single character in several generations covered. It just wasn't my thing. Also, the quote on the jacket was really misleading in my opinion. I was hoping for a bit more mystical connection than what was delivered. I appear to be in the minority on my rating, so it's probably just a matter of personal taste.

Edited to add: I'm sure my opinion was influenced by the fact that I just finished the Millennium series in which the action and escalation was much more intense.